ColeHamelsFacts.com :LAUGH: :LAUGH:

[HHReloaded]

I know it's just a JackBauer/ChuckNorris rip off......but fucc it, shiit is still mad funny.....

http://mysite.verizon.net/heyjude421/chf/chf.html

Cole Hamels only throws three types of pitches: Strike 1, Strike 2, and Strike 3.

Jason Giambi tested positive for fear of Cole Hamels.

Cole Hamels one-hit the '27 Yankees; it would have been a no hitter but he felt bad for Lou Gehrig.

Personal Fav:

Cole would've struck out Joe Carter.

[Mvp_Status]

For charity, Chad Johnson decided that he wanted to face Cole Hamels. He later realized that that's just taking it too far.

Every time Cole Hamels pitches his changeup, one malnourished child in Africa will eat a large meal.

Cole Hamels once pegged a batter so hard that the batter's twin brother died. He then ate their corpses, pooped them out and struck that out too.

My wife yells out Cole Hamels's name in bed (and half the time he isn't there).

When I look to the East in the morning, Cole Hamels comes over the horizon.

Geico saved a lot of money on car insurance by switching to Cole Hamels.

Cole Hamels struck out Jack Bauer, Mr. T, and Chuck Norris to complete a perfect game. Bauer didn't even last 24 seconds in the box. Hamels then pitied the fool that couldn't catch up to his fastball on the outside corner. Finally, Norris tried to roundhouse kick the ball, but even he couldn't handle Cole's changeup.

[HHReloaded]

must up........

[RevolUniek]

Originally Posted by Mvp_Status

Every time Cole Hamels pitches his changeup, one malnourished child in Africa will eat a large meal.

They're all funny, but damn

[HHReloaded]

Cole Hamels isn't left-handed, he's bored.

When Cole Hamels got called up to the majors, 137 minor league players came out of retirement.

Cole Hamels invented a time machine so he could pitch games 6 and 7 of the 1993 World Series.

[Jon McClane]

Cole Hamels actually made Comcast's Daily News Live interesting. (if you from PA you know why thats funny)

If you record yourself saying "Cole Hamels" and play it backwards Judas Priest style, you'll hear: "Koufax Sucked"


Once upon a time, all the continents were together in a land mass known as Pangea. Then they found out about Cole Hamels being born in the future and all the other continents tried to get as far away from North America as possible. South America, knowing Bobby Abreu would be born there in the future, was a little too lazy to get that far.

[Mr.Sam]

You maaaaaaaaaad late on this shiit. I added about 15 of those quotes though.