confusion

[AngeloReyes]

i hang up the phone, i cant bear you yellin at me
maybe we should end it, neither one us are happy
its sad, cuz you said you’ll love me till we die
now you start to cry, how much longer should we try?
right now we got nothin, goin our way
workin till we die, is this the way we gonna stay?
for real though, i feel like were walkin backwards
reminiscin for the future, everytime we talk its awkward
now i dont know, where our **** might be goin
ima right a few more lines, so i can continue flowin
but i wanna get 2 know u better girl, im for real
i would do anythin for u girl, lie, cheat, or steal
we havent talked in a while girl, but i aint trippin
why u gotta play me like that girl, im backflippin
as i continue to flow, were gonna rewind
lets go back to the first few lines and rewind the hands of time
i dont know what happened to us, maybe we choked
like what bob marley said, "oh please dont rock my boat"
so now we float, hover, ascend, over and under
going through our lives like it was rain, lightning and thunder
you make me stutter girl, your eyes pierce my heart
its like im a bulls eye, and your a speeding dart
its kinda dark, that your adding fuel to my fire
when you start to play me, its like im gettin higher
and no girl, for once im not talkin about weed
i dont need that **** no more, your the only one i need
i cant get you outta my mind, i think im insane
not are you inside my head girl, you are my brain
you know what? **** this ****! i think im outtie
next time i see you my emotions, wont overcrowd me
but i cant help it girl, you just too pretty
whenever i look at you, im feelin freaky
im sorry if the words, i use sound like a threat
baby dont even sweat, how much closer can i get?
you stopped sittin at the place, where i met you after school
im lookin around up and down, im lookin like a fool
maybe i was just dreamin, for havin you as my wife
lets forget all this **** happened and move on with our lives

damn girl all this **** i just said, made no sense
im sorry i wasted my time, at your expense.//-

[AngeloReyes]

the line i started with was from 2pac. i needed an opener. thats how i usually start writin. so when i freestyle i never go first cuz i just take whatever the last dude says then carry on from there.

lemme know what you guys think. i just started rappin about 2 weeks ago.

[energy]

Angelo,
Keep it up man.
This is a good start.
Challenge yourself structurally.
You're putting flows together with a couple rhymes hitting but they are all one syllable. It's obvious that you're better than that already. Also, read as much as you can to help the vocab out. It'll give you more weapons. All in all, good effort, if you're really that new to it.