theman080
02-05-08, 11:50 AM
Today I was spittin the average rabble at the tabernackle
This sour apple jackal, leaned back and loudly cackled
"Out of all the liquor pits, bars, where kids have gripped scars
Im the hardest by far, I piss nickels and spit shards"
He was a senior with the odd demeonor of a wallet cleaner
Meaner and wants deposits either of your money or horse
Was gunnin of coarse, so I thought about a run to the doors
But was suddenly forced to stand up, grip up, and man up
"Hands up, buddy boy, and dont move or get jammed up"
His face was weatherbeaten and scarred, he lit up a tabbacco twist
Tipped his hat back a bit, took a drag, and grabbed my chips
"This is how it happens kid, since your purse is a bit light
I'll be taken your horse too, and leave wit your ***** life"
My instincts beckoned for my six shot to lift hot
Quick pop his ***** top & split with his thick gwop
But he had the drop and could rock my lid-top
So I clocked a pit-stop, time for a silver tongue and golden charm
"Hold it pard," Was purchasin seconds every second I spoke
"I guess you should know, the stallions stole, technically though
My wallets nothin but leather, but buried treasure in the desert is gold!"
"You claim to be a cowboy?" "Im claimin to know where gold is."
"No ****, why dont you go and get it if your so slick?"
"Hold this, I found its location as luck, to take it and such
Would require a sharp wit to charge with, but my vacancy's guts"
"You playin me son? Just tell me where it is and my ass is gone."
"My apologies but there's a pre-set of three tests before I pass it on
Chandler Shawn, the cowboy I swore to had his whore do
Some voodoo, to make sure the test are completed before I speak the coarse true."
"I'll force you!" "You'll just put me in the ground wit the gold
The challenge is old, but with you being so gallant and bold
Tests'll be nothin to snap, then you can live in luxury's lap"
He tussled his cap, they all watched to see em tug on his strap
But he did nothin like that, "Tell me what you want from me jack"
"The first test is to be able to take three full pitchers & still pull quicker
Then the saloon's slickest and swiftest hitter, lets see your tool flicker"
The contest was birthed as night yawned but wasnt wide awake yet
The saloon's fastest hands, Jasper Rand, watched as I made bets
He shined his pistol, loaded it, as six bottles were set at thirty paces
The villain finished his required liquor,as whores snickered wit dirty faces
"A lot of folks are bettin on Jasper, so they get what we're after
Who ever hits the most bottles quickest will be victory's captor!"
I crossed my fingers and watched, the countdown was officially docked
I simply was shocked, while Jasper grapped his pistol
The villain sent missles and each bottle was split by his shot
The winnings I snatched em quick, dust picked as wagon's dipped
I gave the villain all I won as he reholstered to distract em quick
Stumbled back into the bar so we could snatch up some seats
Which was a hazardous feat, it was crowded but we managed to creep
We sat their elite, spectators were practically moanin for the second test
"Let me guess. I gotta **** some whores fore' they get undressed!"
Laugter seized each drunk and had them tickled by crafty fingers
The action lingered, as the splintered table massively jabbed my fingers
"Just a simple quiz, git it kid, how many lead balls your pistol hid?"
"****, thats six!" He spat liquor, the stale sting of a cheap brand
Laughter hit each man, as I wiped my eyes and cheeks fast
"This number three than, you gotta shoot the man that asked you number two"
His pistol was in my face before my mouth closed from the sentence
"Next time reload from the second" I spoke, exploding my weapon
The bullet hit em about the same time realization did
Baked his wig, searched his gear for cash and the take was big
Gave Jazper part of the stash in exchange for the ink in which im makin this
:smoker:
This sour apple jackal, leaned back and loudly cackled
"Out of all the liquor pits, bars, where kids have gripped scars
Im the hardest by far, I piss nickels and spit shards"
He was a senior with the odd demeonor of a wallet cleaner
Meaner and wants deposits either of your money or horse
Was gunnin of coarse, so I thought about a run to the doors
But was suddenly forced to stand up, grip up, and man up
"Hands up, buddy boy, and dont move or get jammed up"
His face was weatherbeaten and scarred, he lit up a tabbacco twist
Tipped his hat back a bit, took a drag, and grabbed my chips
"This is how it happens kid, since your purse is a bit light
I'll be taken your horse too, and leave wit your ***** life"
My instincts beckoned for my six shot to lift hot
Quick pop his ***** top & split with his thick gwop
But he had the drop and could rock my lid-top
So I clocked a pit-stop, time for a silver tongue and golden charm
"Hold it pard," Was purchasin seconds every second I spoke
"I guess you should know, the stallions stole, technically though
My wallets nothin but leather, but buried treasure in the desert is gold!"
"You claim to be a cowboy?" "Im claimin to know where gold is."
"No ****, why dont you go and get it if your so slick?"
"Hold this, I found its location as luck, to take it and such
Would require a sharp wit to charge with, but my vacancy's guts"
"You playin me son? Just tell me where it is and my ass is gone."
"My apologies but there's a pre-set of three tests before I pass it on
Chandler Shawn, the cowboy I swore to had his whore do
Some voodoo, to make sure the test are completed before I speak the coarse true."
"I'll force you!" "You'll just put me in the ground wit the gold
The challenge is old, but with you being so gallant and bold
Tests'll be nothin to snap, then you can live in luxury's lap"
He tussled his cap, they all watched to see em tug on his strap
But he did nothin like that, "Tell me what you want from me jack"
"The first test is to be able to take three full pitchers & still pull quicker
Then the saloon's slickest and swiftest hitter, lets see your tool flicker"
The contest was birthed as night yawned but wasnt wide awake yet
The saloon's fastest hands, Jasper Rand, watched as I made bets
He shined his pistol, loaded it, as six bottles were set at thirty paces
The villain finished his required liquor,as whores snickered wit dirty faces
"A lot of folks are bettin on Jasper, so they get what we're after
Who ever hits the most bottles quickest will be victory's captor!"
I crossed my fingers and watched, the countdown was officially docked
I simply was shocked, while Jasper grapped his pistol
The villain sent missles and each bottle was split by his shot
The winnings I snatched em quick, dust picked as wagon's dipped
I gave the villain all I won as he reholstered to distract em quick
Stumbled back into the bar so we could snatch up some seats
Which was a hazardous feat, it was crowded but we managed to creep
We sat their elite, spectators were practically moanin for the second test
"Let me guess. I gotta **** some whores fore' they get undressed!"
Laugter seized each drunk and had them tickled by crafty fingers
The action lingered, as the splintered table massively jabbed my fingers
"Just a simple quiz, git it kid, how many lead balls your pistol hid?"
"****, thats six!" He spat liquor, the stale sting of a cheap brand
Laughter hit each man, as I wiped my eyes and cheeks fast
"This number three than, you gotta shoot the man that asked you number two"
His pistol was in my face before my mouth closed from the sentence
"Next time reload from the second" I spoke, exploding my weapon
The bullet hit em about the same time realization did
Baked his wig, searched his gear for cash and the take was big
Gave Jazper part of the stash in exchange for the ink in which im makin this
:smoker: