"Tha Bass Line Bully"

[paranormatic]

Dear mr.base line bully,
face lyin fully,
sully ur hands mind n matter,
ugly data gatthered criticized analog to digitized,
compute subliminal,
still I rize from the minimal,
temperamental...carry it how u wanna carry it,
I got da shovel to bury you it and some more $hit,
A lesson for da wize n da striaght ig-nit,
I'll bring you da business,
and leave one witness to testify what its like to be touched by da gifted,

mine your manners,

[Cali_Bud]

Ummmmm ... seems like you just tried to put together any big words you could think of at the time. Not really feeling this. Besides you got feedback man you should be happy .. you know how hard it is to get that around here? lol

[Ecliptik]

wow...i'ma crit this for you even though you butt hurt at me...lol

the flow was off....and i do see you took that line seperation advise cause you had your bars somewhat even....congrats on that...as far as the "disses"...you need work....a diss is very similar to a battle verse....the first line is suppose to be a set up, and the second the punch....just some advice....not hatin...

anyways....normally, i love beef....but to be honest....your not worth it...

don't worry...i'll still crit your **** wether it's good or bad....and if i did wish to have beef...it would be with a vet...not a noob...nothin personal