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Midnite
12-05-06, 11:56 PM
Yusef has been an orphan since he was five,
going from relative to relative to stay alive,
his father was killed by soldiers when he was 3,
coming home from work, the occupiers labeled him an enemy,
when he was 5, a smart bombed destroyed his house,
killing his mother and sister, leaving a burial mound,
when he was 10, he met a freedom fighter and hero,
a man of the people, a local savior,
he would mentor young Yusef, turn him into a warrior,
if need be, he would die fighting, and be a martyr,
72 virgins? No need, this wasn't about the afterlife,
this was about freedom and the right to survive,
at 16, he put on an explosive belt and made his way,
to the same checkpoint that his father was slain,
just 50 meters away, he looked down the barrel of a gun,
deadman trigger pressed, Yusef felt that he had won...

Joseph has been an orphan since he was six,
taken in by an uncle who was always sick,
his father was killed manning a checkpoint when he was five,
killed by a terrorist in a business man's disguise,
the next year, his mother took him to a cafe,
to this day, Joseph has never felt safe,
at 16, he joined the army to fulfill his duty,
a week later, his uncle died when terrorists started shooting,
he was assigned to man a checkpoint at 18,
the sameone that had been his father's murder scene,
in the distance, he saw a man walk awkwardly,
with gun in hand, he approached the man cautiously,
50 meters from the checkpoint, the two men stopped,
anywhere else, and this scene would've appeared odd...

Joseph, hand steady, finger over the trigger,
Yusef, hand steady, finger already on the trigger,
the two stared at one another waiting for their cue,
because both knew what they had to do,
together they recited a silent prayer,
and together, they would soon meet their maker,
two sounds and a bright flash,
exposed the very nature of man....

IvI~iki ruka~IvI
12-07-06, 11:18 AM
Damn kicko. This was pretty deep. Found my self some what glued to the screen. I'd like to see you build more on this. Another chapter perhaps?

theman080
12-07-06, 04:27 PM
damn yo, this was nice

The story was ill and the way it was put together was ill too. This shyt was seriously quality.

Stay Up

#1rapper
12-07-06, 09:45 PM
The content was sick in this piece...and yeah another part of this would be nice to see

Invisible Vision
12-07-06, 10:25 PM
you sir, have always been one of the most underrated writers on this site.....


stay up nite

Listen
12-08-06, 04:51 PM
I like the story and the idea, though a few lines got a bit off for me.

Good to read you again/still.

1

eternal reflection
12-13-06, 02:39 PM
greenery !

yaga
12-15-06, 11:08 PM
short response to up that rilly.

Blackeddie
12-29-06, 03:35 AM
yeah that was tight...heart felt...peace

Invisible Vision
12-29-06, 03:44 AM
yeah that was tight...heart felt...peace

whaaaaa....????:ohmy: :ohmy: :ohmy:

damn, comin out the woodwork i tell you!

Midnite
12-30-06, 12:57 AM
yeah that was tight...heart felt...peace


wow....:ohmy: ....the vets are coming back....lovely