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Off Base
11-06-06, 04:55 PM
It’s the eternal struggle of paper vs. pen,
Hitting with a rumble, causing my eraser to bend,
Tracing the Fens with my eyes racing the lens,
As my words make statements and fend
Parry, thrust, they carry dust and carry us,
To various- places defacing barriers,
Like Krylon spray from tips of warriors with cans,
Creating meaning in the corridors I scan,
Leaving me a tortured man,
Torn to plan touring lands,
Lured into lurid lores of lambs,
Which is why I’m on an abortion plan,
Meaning assaults with many fiendish faults,
And I’m reeling as I’m deeming each as a wall…

MaCRonI
11-10-06, 08:53 PM
^^Straight...oc....I gives it a 6.5/10...it seems kinda too short.....

Nasty Manny
11-12-06, 01:06 PM
im digging that nice mutis
you really made since keep it nice and short
so the reading would get tired of reading

Off Base
11-13-06, 11:16 AM
thanks for the feedback guys...

respect
~OB~

theman080
11-13-06, 02:50 PM
Yea **** was pretty good OB, i was feelin the flow and idea of it, keep the shyt comin...

In$ane $hane
12-02-06, 01:35 PM
yea wat they sed