Dmac
10-10-06, 10:12 PM
disis a poem me and dis guy i kno wrote ova da internet i jus need sum criticisms thnx.
{GMT-5}
Love Hate relationship
sorrounded by debate.
devoting each other
to more than just fate.
lies and cheat holding in
all the debry of distrust.
he telling her they can't
be its just lust. she repling
so what did you really mean
when you told me of love?
he's hesitant ready to get out,
she grows restless telling him no
we not done. the heat rises,
she starts crying. our love was ment
to be my heart doesnt lie and
you just too good to me so why
stop trying? he answers her questions
with words of encouragement telling
her she deserves better. he sees no growth
in this relationship so he just won't bother.
like niddles going throw her heart she feels battered.
he walks out, she falls to her knees. (please just another chance)
give up anything for one more night of romance.
but he keeps going not saving her the last dance.
Love hate relationships
they was just better off as friends.
{Dmac}
betta off friendz
yet she wasnt done wif him
afta countless nites alone
and thinkin of him on a whim
she jus culdnt tak it and decided deal wif him
{nobody plays wit ma heart Micheal}
she whispas in da air
{we culda been perfect}
but dissillusioned she c's him shrug witout a care
distressed and half made she walks in da snow half dressed
ready 2 handle
ready 2 handle wat she dnt kno
but she knos micheal wuld neva b happy again
{Micheal im comin!}
she screams in da air
startin 2 run her feet chilled but she dnt care
her face tear streaked and her nightgown flyin in da air
she arrives in gud tym but bad tym 4 him
she sneaks in his place thru da bac ready 2 4giv him
or kill him either way he's hurrs
she arrives in his room wif a butcher knife in hand
den hears her heart wrench wen she c's anotha gurl in his bed
{Micheal how culd u?}
she cries wif a mad look in her eye
{baby i can explain}
micheal yells scared 4 his life
and b4 anybody culd say anythin she cut de girls throat
stabs micheal while blood spills everywhere
and deres a smile of madness and joy on her face
as she c's Micheal die in de end
and she whispas in his ear
{u kno u were ryt we betta off as friends}
{GMT-5}
Love Hate relationship
sorrounded by debate.
devoting each other
to more than just fate.
lies and cheat holding in
all the debry of distrust.
he telling her they can't
be its just lust. she repling
so what did you really mean
when you told me of love?
he's hesitant ready to get out,
she grows restless telling him no
we not done. the heat rises,
she starts crying. our love was ment
to be my heart doesnt lie and
you just too good to me so why
stop trying? he answers her questions
with words of encouragement telling
her she deserves better. he sees no growth
in this relationship so he just won't bother.
like niddles going throw her heart she feels battered.
he walks out, she falls to her knees. (please just another chance)
give up anything for one more night of romance.
but he keeps going not saving her the last dance.
Love hate relationships
they was just better off as friends.
{Dmac}
betta off friendz
yet she wasnt done wif him
afta countless nites alone
and thinkin of him on a whim
she jus culdnt tak it and decided deal wif him
{nobody plays wit ma heart Micheal}
she whispas in da air
{we culda been perfect}
but dissillusioned she c's him shrug witout a care
distressed and half made she walks in da snow half dressed
ready 2 handle
ready 2 handle wat she dnt kno
but she knos micheal wuld neva b happy again
{Micheal im comin!}
she screams in da air
startin 2 run her feet chilled but she dnt care
her face tear streaked and her nightgown flyin in da air
she arrives in gud tym but bad tym 4 him
she sneaks in his place thru da bac ready 2 4giv him
or kill him either way he's hurrs
she arrives in his room wif a butcher knife in hand
den hears her heart wrench wen she c's anotha gurl in his bed
{Micheal how culd u?}
she cries wif a mad look in her eye
{baby i can explain}
micheal yells scared 4 his life
and b4 anybody culd say anythin she cut de girls throat
stabs micheal while blood spills everywhere
and deres a smile of madness and joy on her face
as she c's Micheal die in de end
and she whispas in his ear
{u kno u were ryt we betta off as friends}