Untitled...The Silent Entry

[sexydeltagirl]

In the deepest part of me...
I've stored your memory....
Locked away with the keys of remembrance...
I took a chance on being happy...
Yet here I stand...
Broken...
Your promises not kept...
Words used the I regret...
Yet I still wonder where...
We went wrong...
Did the entry of envy curse your heart....
We both wanted to seek success...
But your progress was slow....
I stood by you when times were rough...
Guided your hand and displayed love...
Geninue...
Regardless of set-backs, set-ups and mix matched...
Sentiments...
I stayed...
Always listening...
Continously forgiving....
But that was not good enough...
I gave you my tit to suck...
Treated you like my baby...
I didn't mean for my maternal instintics to effect my point of view...
You were my man not my child...
Trying to change you into the man I wanted..
The one who had such promise...
I forgot the number one rule...
Changing is hard to do...
I should have known when it was time to leave...
I allowed pity its silent entry....

[Advent Verbal Kent]

I'm diggin ur thoughts. Defently intouch with yourself and your feelings. From the few drops I've peeped from you I have only one bone to pick. I wish you would draw out some of your lines. For some one that has so much emotion you restrict yourself to 3 or 4 words a line. I can understand if this is your "style" but I'd love to see your next drop have some nice fluid lines in it.



AvK

[sexydeltagirl]

I'm diggin ur thoughts. Defently intouch with yourself and your feelings. From the few drops I've peeped from you I have only one bone to pick. I wish you would draw out some of your lines. For some one that has so much emotion you restrict yourself to 3 or 4 words a line. I can understand if this is your "style" but I'd love to see your next drop have some nice fluid lines in it.
AvK

Thanks for the feedback - Some of my pieces go really deep and give you the backdrop and all that good stuff and some pieces leave the reader a chance to expand on what I wrote or just get them thinking...

If you do a search you'll see some of my earlier work had a lot of description and flow...

....;)