Necronomican

[MIKE BLESS]

who read this

some crazy ass artist muthafukka on all type of drugs who nonetheless was a brilliant artist said that you would go insane if you read this

[MIKE BLESS]

I GOT A HOLD OF THIS, WEIRD STUFF, I WOULDN'T RECCOMEND THAT YOU TAKE IT SERIOUS

[offthabooks]

^^tell me more

[LT]

rather smoke crack

[MIKE BLESS]

^^tell me more
HMMMMMM
DONT KNOW
HOW OPEN OF A MIND DO YOU HAVE???
WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE IN???

[offthabooks]

HMMMMMM
DONT KNOW
HOW OPEN OF A MIND DO YOU HAVE???
WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE IN???
very open minded...believe in whatever isn't bs....

but I have heard this book is ficticious anyways...not interested in reading it (have heard it has some kinda "demonic" twist...that's not literature I'm interested in picking up), so much as I'm interested in hearing what the actual point of the book is(or what your take on it was)...

[caramellady85]

I just read some review for it on amazon

"I have a really annoying neighbor who allows their dog to do his business in my lawn. I've called, complained, even sent brownies to resolve the issue. It's been really annoying because on Sundays I have custody of the children so I need to let them play in the backyard while I watch football without worrying about doggie doo. It's been a real downward spiral.

But then I heard about the Necronomicon from a friend. I was skeptical, of course, but I decided the price was right and tried it out. Amazing! Three days and ten sacrificed goats later, I was able to conjure demons to attack my neighbor. Sure, the screaming has kept me up all hours of the night, but my yard is doo doo free, and for that, it's definitely worth it!!" :laugh: :huh:

"I really believed this book was a joke until one fateful September day when I read a love spell onto an apple to give to a woman who I have secretly desired for several years. Not only did it work, it worked so well that this wonderful, beautiful girl who was the apple of my eye for several months just started letting herself go because she made me her whole world. She stopped taking showers, eating right (if at all), she would wake me up at all hours of the night to read me love poetry. I finally confessed to her that her love was not real, it was from the spell I had cast and she became so angry she went out, purchased a copy, and started turning my world inside out. One car jacking, two burglaries, three assaults, several restraining orders, a mental hygiene commitment, and a hasty move later, I've finally freed myself of the date from hell!

If you value your life and your sanity, DON'T MESS WITH THIS BOOK!!!" :weirdo:

"If you have any sense at all, heed this advice: avert your eyes from this work of evil. I once faltered into a dark age of my own soul and attempted some of these rituals in anger in the depths of my parents basement.

It has since become a horrific place that I dare not go. I can hear the scraping and hissings of damned souls from my bedroom at night. I have to turn up my headphones all the way and let "The Cure" blot it out. I fear it will only get worse from here..

What have I done?" :ohmy:

um... i'll pass

[LT]

I just read some review for it on amazon

" Three days and ten sacrificed goats later, I was able to conjure demons to attack my neighbor. Sure, the screaming has kept me up all hours of the night, but my yard is doo doo free, and for that, it's definitely worth it!!" :laugh: :huh:



:laugh:

[MIKE BLESS]

so much as I'm interested in hearing what the actual point of the book is(or what your take on it was)...
hard to say bruh
all im sayin is that its some fukked up shyt if in the wrong hands
these muthafukkaz are makin smiley faces "lol" at the shyt but i think its serious
while theres always idiots and mentally ill people who claim that theyre capable of sorcery or act like theyre into withcraft, there's people who are really on some shyt

[LT]

fukk dat B
i'll fukking :laugh:
all i fukkin want B
if i find those comments about the fukkin book funny, so muthafukkin B it

****, i don't need no apples
but i can't believe you of all people would seriously believe this book

so fukk you and your fukkin comments B
i'm laughing at it, cause it ain't serious.

[MIKE BLESS]

man
those are some snide ass comments made by some wanna-be journalist amazon.com reviewer
you wont laugh when some shyt happens to your ass, on account of some crazy ish
man fukk this thread

[LT]

so what you are saying is you can really do some shiit with the spells and potions(if any) in this book?

[FaZedONE]

actually there is an entire book about the necronomicon phenomena, and the published necronomicon is a book of fiction, tho it does contain rituals which can be practiced.

[skanky80]

Started in one of Lovecrafts stories

its just fake bs...

[offthabooks]

man fukk this thread
word, but you did get 13 replies...

that's damn near platinum status in the book club....you should be proud Mike Bless

[LT]

are u counting his replies, caus ethat doesn't count
and you should omit a few of mine

I think of oscar the grouch when i see bless' name on SOHH

[MIKE BLESS]

I think of oscar the grouch when i see bless' name on SOHH
the irony in this statement is almost enough to piss a muthafukka off but its all good louie :mad:

[Colonel Sanders]

Those books (the original and the plagiarized version) are both works of fiction; why are you taking them so seriously?

[MIKE BLESS]

cause i know that croley was powerful man and
the shyt contained in this book is how black magic muthafukkaz get down
someone once tried to do some shyt to me, fukk yall im not tellin yall anymore about it

[offthabooks]

someone once tried to do some shyt to me, fukk yall im not tellin yall anymore about it
but I wanna knowwwwwww

[Bone Daddy]

cause i know that croley was powerful man and
the shyt contained in this book is how black magic muthafukkaz get down
someone once tried to do some shyt to me, fukk yall im not tellin yall anymore about it
People way overstate waht Crowley did. Dude was a drug addict and syphilitic as were most of his followers. Both drugs and syphilis are known to seriously impede your abilities as far as thinking are concerned. Frankly anything that would give credence to his "magical power" need to be taken not just with a grain of salt but probably a whole mines worth.

[MIKE BLESS]

but I wanna knowwwwwww
ok fine
i seen in my subsciptions that this thread was upped today so i'll explain just a little
one summer, a crazy summer indeed, i left my mind open to a whole bunch of fukked up ideas & energies
i messed around with a clinically insane girl with a dark heart, and bad things happened to me in the aftermath, i suspect that she was behind them - but thankfully, the evil couldn't get the best of me

[king of tha kingdom]

one summer, a crazy summer indeed, i left my mind open to a whole bunch of fukked up ideas & energies
i messed around with a clinically insane girl with a dark heart, and bad things happened to me in the aftermath, i suspect that she was behind them - but thankfully, the evil couldn't get the best of meman, you should write a book about THAT

[MIKE BLESS]

man, you should write a book about THAT
WORD B
SHYT WAS CRAZY
WOULD DEFINITELY GO PAST THE MARGIN ON EVERY PAGE IF IT WERE EVER PUT OT DOWN ON PAPER

[LT]

:ohmy:

[MIKE BLESS]

cant nobody see the smilies
you gotta step your linguistics game up now

[LT]

cant nobody see the smilies
you gotta step your linguistics game up now
MAYBE I LIKE THE WAY IT DIDN'T SHOW UP...

I DON'T WANNA TALK MUTHAFUKKA
I'M HERE TO READ WHAT YALL TALKING ABOUT

[FaZedONE]

That book has a few facts, its mostly a buncha fake whack looking squiggly line runes.

[mcg]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Necronomicon

The Necronomicon is a fictional book invented by H.P. Lovecraft and is often featured in stories based on the Cthulhu mythos inspired by his works.

Though Lovecraft insisted the book was pure invention (and other writers invented passages from the book in their own works), there are accounts of some people actually believing his Necronomicon to be a real book. Even during Lovecraft's life he received letters from fans inquiring about the Necronomicon's authenticity. Occasionally, pranksters listed the Necronomicon for sale in book store newsletters or inserted phony library card catalogue entries for the book.

A blatant hoax version of the Necronomicon was produced by paranormal researcher and writer Colin Wilson, describing how it was translated by computer from a discovered "cipher text." It is far truer to the Lovecraftean version and even incorporates quotations from Lovecraft's stories into its passages.

Historical "Books of the Dead" such as the ancient Egyptian Book of the Dead or the Tibetan Bardo Thodol are sometimes described as "real Necronomicons." They should not be confused with the Lovecraft Necronomicon, as their contents are meant to be read or remembered by the dead, rather than used by the living to summon the dead. Lovecraft, however, may have been inspired by these books.

[MIKE BLESS]

have The Book Of The Dead (the version prepared by a Sir E.A. Wallis Budge that is); only read small sections of it a few years ago, a lotta heiroglyphics
maybe I just gotta stop using caffeine and prescription drugs (as dispensed, never abused) but I just can't seem to get in the correct mindframe to absorb that shyt in the past 3 years of my life; I would have to ingest some ill chemicals, which I don't wanna do at this point

[ginnal]

I have the book at home, so far it seems stupid.

then again I'm only on the third page.

[MIKE BLESS]

I have the book at home, so far it seems stupid.

then again I'm only on the third page.
don't bother, I'm sure you will hate it and find it stupid, if you bother to complete it, and will probably have some seething remarks for this thread directed at me (directly or indirectly)

[ginnal]

don't bother, I'm sure you will hate it and find it stupid, if you bother to complete it, and will probably have some seething remarks for this thread directed at me (directly or indirectly)
Sorry wrong book, the book I have is cryptonomicon, it's about crytopgraphy.

[Pagan God]

i have it...shyts just a novelty.

[Kanekash]

Sounds like I wouldn't like it either. I never get into black magic or anything devilish or whatever, but I am interested in learning more I guess. I thought I heard voices b4 (and one seemed to be the devil) but it was really all in my head, so Im not sure if I'll believe this book, or if I even want to read it. I won't even watch the Skeleton Key.